Random Thoughts From The Compleat Man.
Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. Nothing sucks more than when I’m arguing with my wife and realize I’m wrong. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. There is great need for a sarcasm font. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? Was learning cursive really necessary? Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I know how to get out of my neighborhood. Bad decisions make good stories. Mmmmm Ham. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Beer than Kay. I wish my GPS had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important, witness the evolution of the species. Sometimes I think I’m hungry but really I’m just bored. The only target I hit on the first shot every time is the snooze button. Ultra light beer is stupid, if you want abs, don’t drink beer. What sounds better, steak or Kate Upton?
No comments:
Post a Comment